I kept struggling with the big bag I was carrying till I got into my apartment. I regretted not letting that barrow guy help me out when he offered, but it wasn’t really my fault. I had no extra money to pay him; all I had was the money for the keke driver who would bring me home. The hike in price of food stuffs and other commodities meant I would be spending more to get fewer things and my tight budget wasn’t even helping matters.



I have been dying to have a plate of coconut rice and today was just the best time to make it a reality. It was Saturday and since I wasn’t going to work, I decided to devote plenty of my time to shopping and making the rice.


I quickly unpacked my bag and changed to a more comfortable house wear. I have a habit of playing music while cooking or washing and again, this was a good time. Everything seemed to be in place and I knew I was bound to have a great time that afternoon.


And a great time it was!



Food was ready and the aroma filled the room, I could almost bet my neighbours were salivating. The plantain I fried sent the message that my coconut rice left off and it was just perfect to drive home the point. I quickly sat on my bed and leveled the mountain that was before me, I wasn’t a slow-eater so the heap went down faster than it imagined. I did justice to the meat and smoked fish I used in preparing it and it was like a dream come true. After eating, I had no choice than to give the Lord a sleeping offering as a token of my gratitude for a day well spent; this I did with all pleasure.


And a deep sleep it was!



Except that I had many dreams, I know they were about eight different scenes. I just kept moving from one place to the other. How could one have so many dreams in a short nap and be unable to remember at least one vividly? I lay on my bed thinking, trying to get a clue, any scene at all that meant something, anything. But none came, so I got tired of thinking. I just let it go. The song on my phone was still playing; it was ‘Pieces’ by ‘Amanda Cook’ the new song I downloaded yesterday. I had my way with lyrics so they came very easily and I sang along with her:



Unreserved, unrestrained, your love is wild,

Your love is wild for me,
It isn’t shy, it’s unashamed

Your love is proud to be seen with me

You don’t give your heart in pieces,

You don’t hide yourself to tease us

Uncontrolled, uncontained,

Your love is a fire
Burning bright for me

It’s not just a spark , It’s not just a flame;

Your love is a light
That all the world will see
That all the world will see

You don’t give your heart in pieces, you don’t hide yourself to tease us
You don’t give your heart in pieces, you don’t hide yourself to tease us

Your love’s not fractured,

it’s not a troubled mind
It isn’t anxious
It’s not the restless kind

Your love’s not passive
It’s never disengaged
It’s always present
It hangs on every word we say
Love keeps its promises
It’s keeps its word
It honors what’s sacred
Cause it’s vows are good
Your love’s not broken
It’s not insecure
Your love’s not selfish
You love is pure
You don’t give your heart in pieces,

You don’t hide yourself to tease us


As I sang, I felt Gods love all over again. But now, it was beyond my feelings, I knew it deep inside my heart that indeed God loves me and he doesn’t like to shame me. That got me on my feet dancing and rejoicing. It made all the difference in the world. I didn’t even worry about the fact that I was banned from coming into the church; the place where I was felt like heaven, I was right in the presence of God in my room.



It was as if my playlist was duly informed of the songs I needed to hear at that moment; they followed one another in a quick succession. Israel Houghton’s ‘Your presence is heaven to me’ was followed by ‘No longer slaves’ by Bethel music. When Jesus cultures’ ‘Your love never fails’ began, I couldn’t hold it back anymore. I let the tears flow freely:



Your love never fails, never gives up, never runs out on me

On and on and on and on it goes, it overwhelms and satisfies my soul

And I will never ever have to be afraid, one thing remains

In death, in life am confident and covered by the power of your great love

My debt is paid, there’s nothing that can separate my heart from your great love.

I had a priceless moment that I didn’t want to trade for anything. It was like I was being carried by God in his arms and his love was poured into my heart. I didn’t even know the day was already far spent till my neighbours’ daughter, Princess came knocking at my door. She was a sweet, little 7-year old cutie that had become a great friend and we were getting fond of each other. Her parents Barrister & Mrs. Bright were young couples who I admired and respected, and they lived peacefully in the neighbourhood. Princess had come to bid me farewell in the morning when her school bus came to pick her up for a picnic organized by their school to mark the end of the session while I was preparing to go to the market and I teased her to bring something for me.



“Aunty Nnenna, am back”, she called out to me while knocking persistently on my door.


“Alright dear, am coming”


“I brought something for you, open the door”


I hurried to wipe my face and get the door.


She ran in and hugged me tightly.


“Aunty Nnenna I enjoyed my self today”


“Wow, welcome darling. I can see that, your face is radiant and your dress is messed up with sand and ice cream, play play girl. Tell me about it”


“Yes aunty, we went to Zenith parks and gardens and also went to the mall. I entered the pirate ship, I was so scared when it started moving and I kept screaming, even our Aunty in school that was holding me, she was scared too and she even screamed more than me.”


“Hahahaha”, I couldn’t help but laugh


“Then me and my friend Grace danced in the dancing competition and I won, I was the best dancer.”




“They gave me extra ice cream and pop corn and a chance to ride the roller coaster with our Proprietress.”


“Wow, am proud of you sweety. You are really a Princess”


“I brought my pop corn for you”


“Awwww, thanks sweet heart. I really appreciate you. We will eat it together over that our movie; Alice in Wonderland. Hope you still remember it”


“Yes, you promised me that I will watch it after my exams, even Cinderella and the Barbie series.”


“Yes my dear, we will see all of them together, thank God we already have popcorn.”


We laughed some more.


“Let me go and have my shower, my mummy said I should bath before going anywhere but I begged her to allow me see you just to give you what I brought for you.”


“Awww…that’s so thoughtful of you dearie. Bye, we will see later. Just go and have your bath and rest well. Thank you so much.”


I felt like an angel just gave me a gift from heaven.


“I made coconut rice for you o, I would have given you to eat now but am sure you have had your fill for the day. I will reserve it for you in the fridge; when you come back from Church tomorrow, I will warm it and fry your plantain for you”


“Ehen Aunty Nnenna, when will you follow me to my church? Our Aunty in church is very nice and you will like her, remember I told you her name is also Aunty Nnenna and she is nice like you.”


“Hahaha Princess, you are very funny o. Even if I follow you to church, I will be in the adult church; you know I won’t follow you to the children’s department.”


“Yes, but you will still see her after the service, she used to go and join the adult church when we dismiss.”


“Ok dear, I will come during your children’s anniversary. Hope that’s ok by you?”


“What about tomorrow. Will you be going to your church?”


“Emmmmm…Yes, No, Not really.” I stammered



I couldn’t tell Princess about my suspension, she wouldn’t understand. I had planned to go and look for another place of worship this Sunday. I hadn’t been to any church in the past two weeks and I really wanted to go church hunting to check out other places of worship and possibly join one, if I see any that I like.


“No dear, but I will be going somewhere else.” I finally replied


“Where? Please Aunty Nnenna, come to my church tomorrow, we have our bible recitation challenge tomorrow and I will be part of it.” She pleaded


“Ok, dear, let me think about it. I will come to your house to greet your mum before I go to bed, then I will give you my answer, you have to go now so mummy won’t be worried”


“Thank you aunty. Bye”


I watched her go and I felt a ting of emotion welling up within me. I loved Princess and I knew she loved me and always meant well for me. She was so young and naïve yet her love was pure, strong and unconditional. I loved the way she loved me. Could it be God showing me how much he loved me through this little girl?


…this love is so great that you will never see the end of it or fully understand it. Eph 3:18


My heart was gladdened to know God still loved me and that no matter how anyone else showed me love, it was just a tip of the iceberg, nothing compared to the one he has for me.



It was now three weeks after my suspension and though it was meant to last for two weeks, I still hadn’t heard from my Pastor. Not even Pastor Emeka had called since then. Could it be that they won him over to their side or was he banned from calling me. I was really worried and imagined that they had finally decided to let go of me, maybe I didn’t look repentant or God spoke to them as usual to cut me off completely. I wondered if it was the same God that was still showing me his love every day. I just stayed with my suspicions and refused to believe any of them.



I still wanted to go back to the church, but now I decided that since they didn’t want me, I will find a new place.



I almost forgot to go and check on Princess as I promised; she must have been expecting me. I quickly hurried off to their apartment, I was sure she would be glad at my decision and I could imagine the excitement on her face when I tell her I will be following her to their church. But when I got to her house she was sound asleep so I just greeted her mum and made enquires about the time they would be leaving for the service. She was glad to have me join them though she still wondered why. I simply told her that Princess invited me and I didn’t want to turn it down.



“Thanks for leaving your church to join us, I know you are very devoted even in the choir and I know this will be a huge sacrifice for you to spare one Sunday and worship with us. God bless you dear.”



“Amen. Thank you ma”. I didn’t need to give her any details.





The church was a small one, more like a family church. There were very few young people; many of members were elderly and middle-aged people. I enjoyed the service though I had to leave at some point with Mrs Bright to go and watch her daughter’s recitation challenge at the children’s department. She did excellently well, she was just a bunch of brain and beauty and I envied her mum. She even recited scriptures I wasn’t very familiar with and I felt so proud of her. She was given a bible as the winner and we took pictures too.



When we returned to the adult church, the message was almost over. I just heard the Pastor encouraging them to stand firm in the face of challenges. When it was time to welcome the first timers, I was reluctant to stand up at first; I feared that my life would be bugged with text messages and calls afterwards. But Mrs. Bright gave me that look that dragged me to my feet, exactly the same thing my mum would have done. I reluctantly stood up and said my name when the microphone got to me. We were taken to a special place for further information and refreshment; the part I really liked. They gave us a form to fill and a free gift of one of the Pastor’s books.



Princess and her mum spent some time catching up with other families while they waited for me. Mr Bright was out of town for a conference so it was just the three of us, and we drove off.



“Nnenna, hope you enjoyed the service?” Mrs. Bright asked


“Yes ma. I did, very much”.



We went on to talk about Princess’ performance and we couldn’t stop praising her. When we got home I thanked them for having me and bid them goodbye.



While I  made my way to my room, Princess stopped me to ask:



“Aunty Nnenna, since you enjoyed the service will you now be coming to our Church all the time?”



I was startled by that question. I just turned and smiled at her and she giggled.



I wished I had an answer.

Written by


Hey there,
I am Chinasa, one fiercely loved by Christ and wife of an amazing husband.

I am passionate about not missing the simplicity that is in Christ Jesus that's why on Nasalian blog I love to tell stories in a radical and simple way.

I love to write and create insightful contents and reviews that'll leave you thinking outside the box and when I'm not reading or writing, I love to meet people, talk and travel (no sea routes please!)

Yours sincerely can stay in a room for 'forever' as long as I have spaghetti, good books, good music, and my husband😊.

So people like to think that I'm quiet but heyyyy I'm loud on paper!

One of my lifelong dreams is attending a Hillsong conference preferably in Australia and vacationing in Orlando Florida at the same time. Don't ask me how #smiles.

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