Hello everyone, How is it going? I hope we are having a great time, am happy to be writing to Young ladies again and its super exciting.
I live in a certain community that still looks too good to be true, that’s what I will be talking about today.
In my last post here on Young Girls Forum, I encouraged everyone to build quality friendships and I promised to share how my friends have been a huge blessing to me.
Let me first say that it is very important to allow God lead you in the choice of friends (it’s not only in the choice of a life partner that we will start seeking God. If you have been following him in other areas, then that one won’t be a problem at all! Can I get a witness?).
Let me also say that my life has been tremendously blessed by beautiful, godly relationships that I have never regretted. When I came into school in my first year, I was a big time JJC (Johnny just come) plus I was very naive. I didn’t know a single soul in UNN except my older secondary school mate who had by that new semester moved to UNEC campus (I was in the Nsukka campus). So I was all alone in the big world of University with no mum and dad, bro and sis and no friend. I continued this way until I found myself in a ‘gang’ of ladies who later became my acquaintances, I moved along with them and they even introduced me to night class (where I always slept till the next morning) while others were reading, it just didn’t work for me. With time, I didn’t need an angel to tell me that they were not my kind of persons, nothing wrong with them but we didn’t just gel.
One thing led to the other and I found myself in a campus fellowship (CASOR). One day in our Fellowship after a teaching on “Godly relationships” I made a simple prayer: I asked God to give me a friend and a mentor and …bam! That was it. He didn’t just give me a friend and a mentor; he gave me friends and mentors that have helped me a lot in life. He didn’t read out any names for me to submit an application for friendship, he just orchestrated several events and we ‘clicked’, they are godly ladies that have become an integral part of my community. I just settled into their company and melted in like the milk in Cold Stone ice cream. All these events were used by God to lead me to the right people that have stuck ever since then.
Let me talk a little about my friends.
They are certainly a people of like minds, this doesn’t mean that we don’t disagree, it only means that we give each other the opportunity to be herself without fear of being judged or criticized or even looked down on. There a lot of people out there that have been grossly misunderstood simply because of their uniqueness and they are termed weird.
We see eye-to-eye on almost all issues, this doesn’t also mean that we don’t correct each other, we do and in love too. It’s simply because we take our cue from the word of God, the eternal standard. We speak the truth and spur each other unto good works and being all that God wants us to be. We laugh a lot and share a lot, we have fun too- a good dose.
I don’t know if you have been heartbroken before because someone betrayed your trust and have proven the world that says no one is to be trusted right. Maybe you were the object of gossip and it really hurt, am sorry about that. But I want you to know that God can still lead you in your friendships, I still I believe in building godly relationships and mentorship. It helps a whole lot; it’s not wise to be a lone ranger in this life. God wants us to connect with one another.
Your friends are in the family of God (I don’t mean your denomination); also they are not in America or China (you could still have them there). What am saying is that they are around you.
God doesn’t hide our friends from us so we can spend all our lives seeking them out, No; He reveals them to us by bringing them our way through various events of life.
I strongly encourage us to connect with one another. I know you like your private life; I love mine more, I know you don’t want to be hurt; me too. Being vulnerable is a familiar fear and I have been afraid of that too, but I want to let you know that there is beauty and strength when we share our lives with others. We achieve a lot when we let others in and also be a part of their lives, we live our dreams when we live in a community of like minds.
Godly ladies connect, they pray for one another, they love real hard, they ‘compete’ to out-love each other, they spur each other unto good works and are happy to see the other grow into the fullness of Christ. They pray for one another and scold one another in love, they also disagree and quarrel sometimes, but they end up getting even stronger. They also talk about hair, boys, clothes, make-up, and all the plenty ‘wahala’ that trouble the female folk. They are free to confide in one another because they know they won’t be betrayed.
This connection is not just in spiritual matters, sometimes I want to make a choice about a certain cloth or hair and my friends do help me out. One time I went to market alone to buy a dress I was to use for an occasion (I can be indecisive when it comes to clothes. lol) so, after paying I asked my friend to check out the dress, she gave it a big NO and ordered me to return it immediately. I protested that I had already paid but she insisted; she even had to come and help me return it and pick another one. At that time, I was blind to how ‘ugly’ that dress really was but later I kept wondering how I even picked it in the first place, I just thanked God she intervened. I really loved the one she chose, it was nice and I was glad I didn’t take that first one. This is just one out of many instances and they span through both the mundane and the spiritual things of life.
Regardless of what the society says or thinks, I still believe we can have beautiful godly relationships among ladies. Let’s help one another and spend time building each other up instead of tearing ourselves down.
It’s time to get out of that shell, it’s time to loosen up and enjoy your community. It’s time to stop holding back because of a past sad experience. It’s ok to let others share that load on your shoulder, it’s weighing you down and a little extra hand won’t hurt that much, there is always that friend that sticks closer than a brother- that’s a member of your community.
Remember: Want a friend? Be a friend!
Let’s connect with our community.
PS: Don’t forget to drop your comment so we all can learn and feel free to share too